Reconstruction

Media elites and establishment blowhards are all out of panic buttons. Table-punding is all that remains. Never in the history of American politics, and perhaps world politics, have so many experts been so wrong for so long about a candidate. Yes, I'm speaking about Donald Trump. The racist, the buffoon, that horrible xenophobe, and whatever else the so-called experts have dubbed him. Initially, journalists and opponents scoffed at the idea of his candidacy. But after several stout interviews and controversial remarks that unexpectedly benefited Trump, the hit men were called in. From MSNBC, CNN, and even Fox. They brought in the likes of George Will, Charles Krauthammer, and Chris Matthews. When that failed to stem the tide, it was time for the elites to get serious. Bill Clinton took an ill-advised shot at The Donald. One simple twitter response from Trump was all it took. Like an overhead right from Iron Mike, we never heard from Bill again. As Scarborough so succinctly put it, "The Clintons laid down like lambs." That Trump managed to instantaneously quiet the man behind one the great political machines of modern times is remarkable enough. What is more remarkable is his threat sprung into action all the journalistic minions who've been on the Clinton gravy train since Glass Steagall was nicely tucked away in the China cabinet of Wall Street's despicable history. The media proved just as ineffectual as Bubba, and instead revealed all the journalists who, in reality, were merely guns for hire.

But Trump's pulverization of royalty was far from over. Far, far, from over. Sensing the desperation of the moment, elites decided the GOP, not Democrat luminaries, needed to reign Trump in. And going one step further, the anointed assassin was none other than the Bush Family. This made sense. After all, if Jeb really wanted the nomination, it was his $150 million mess to clean up. So in trotted the political equivalent of the 1927 Yankees. Murderers Row. Mama Bush. Papa Bush. And Brother Bush. Like the Canons of Fort Sumpter that heralded the start of the Civil War, the Bushes arrived to a clamorous Carolina contingent with hopes of silencing the North once again. But, alas, that failed too. Dubya was a couple of years late, and somehow a 90 year old woman in a walker just didn't have the oomph some had envisioned. And with that, Jeb went capooot!, and with a whimper, the Bush Dynasty was gone. All at the hands of political novice. And all within but a few days.

But Trump wasn't done. For ecclesiastical royalty would soon surround the House of Trump. Yet, the Pope of Rome had to issue a retraction just one day later, a retreat unlike any Rome has known since the Fall of Acre. Not to be outdone, South Carolina decided they too desired their very own form of royal martyrdom, in the name of Governess Nikki Haley. Her ringing endorsement of Ro-bio was earth-shattering news, at least for 4 seconds until the next Fox News Alert came streaming across the screen. Ultimately, that too failed, and again, within days.

What Donald Trump survived in South Carolina, over the course of just a few days, is nothing short of mind-boggling. He destroyed the Bush Dynasty on their own turf. Overcame a wildly popular South Carolina Governor. And turned the Pope from Lion to Lamb. And then, he blew out the field in convincing fashion. There are no parallels in political history for what happened down South. To partially borrow a phrase from famed sportscaster Brent Musberger, "You are looking live, at political history being made".